The Mustard Seed Conspiracy

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UNSHAKEABLE REMAINS

Photo: K.Dagen

The day it happened, all was bright.

As she reflected on the day’s beauty, the warmth of the sun soaked her skin. She delighted in days like these. Not only does the world become brighter, more alive, but so do her dreams, her activities, her work, her relationships. She looked around at the little world she has built for herself. She smiles and takes a deep breath of the cool air. Yes, it’s good.

Despite the apparent perfection that day, she could not ignore a familiar nagging deep within her; a lingering ebb and flow of a feeling she has never been able to pinpoint. Something was not right. Yet to confront the feeling would be to lose the moment. She chose to push the feeling to the side.

She heard it first in the distance. A slow rumble. Could there be a storm approaching? But how? The sky was still so blue…

Another loud blast resounded and echoed off the mountains, closer to her now. This was not a storm. Her heart finally began to pound with a curious fear. Anxiously, she scanned her surroundings as her mind tried to make sense of what was happening. The blasts were coming closer, louder, faster, and she could do nothing but stand in the shock of complete and utter terror.

Almost as if in a dream, the essence of herself and her world was presented before her. She saw all that she loved; things she herself had built and created. Scattered among them were lies she believed. There were fears she was giving into. She saw the things she was holding on to. She saw the things she should have kept.

There was no time for comprehension. No time to react. She closed her eyes, covered her face and head in her arms, and waited until the destruction passed through.

The nagging feeling she couldn’t pinpoint transformed into a voice, first a steady whisper, growing, reverberating up and out of her until it filled the air around her.

This is not of Me!

The things she loved and built explode from their foundations.

This is not of Me!

 All she held on to is loosened and ripped from her grasp.

This is not of Me!

Lies and fears are leveled to the ground. 

And then all becomes still, silent.

Her ears ring as if a bomb had gone off. The world has gone black – she can see nothing around her. Has she gone blind?

She tastes the salty mix of blood and tears on her lip. As she lifts her hands up to feel her head, the pain of her bruised body sets in. As the dust and smoke clear, so does her vision. The horizon ahead reveals a leveled landscape. All that once was is gone.

Like her shaking, the ground still trembles beneath her feet in the traces of aftershock.

Beneath her feet.

She is still standing.


A man walks up beside her, but she did not see where he came from. He says nothing to her as he starts to clear away the rubble around her.

Finally, He looks at her.  With teary eyes He says, “I’m sorry, child. This had to be done. “

She cannot muster up the strength to respond; she continues to watch Him work.

“I would like to rebuild this with you. “

She takes a step forward.

She takes a step toward Him, unshakeable.

Only she and Him remain.