i woke up this morning
to find a day dawning bright
with sunshine
and an empty ache in my womb

as I sip my coffee
I want nothing more
than to cradle an infant in my arms
I don’t want this day
with its unmet expectation

there is no “instead” here
only tension
pictures of other women’s babies in their arms
in a facebook feed (I know, I shouldn’t look)
and a handmade mug warm between my palms

curled in my chair, crying
for all anyone needs is nothing
and I feel as though I have it

AMANDA BRINDLEY

Amanda lives in Southwest Ohio, where she works 9-5 in a local bookstore warehouse while dabbling in many creative endeavors--writing children's books, poetry, and creative non-fiction, watercoloring, drawing, baking and gardening. She loves connecting deeply with people, laughing and adventuring with her friends, hiking, and recommending Leif Enger's latest novel, Virgil Wander.